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November 19, 2012
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Dear Naive 15,  

You're ignorant as Hell.

You dress in baggy blue jeans, wear an oversized hoodie every day, and never let your hair down. Students at school, and even your mom, think you're gay… and you don't even know.

All of your classmates blame you for a burn book that circulated after that Mean Girls movie. Everyone thinks you're a jealous bitch and secretly they mock you. How can you not see that?

Your teachers are all positive that you cut yourself and that you're always on drugs. Even now you have no idea why they ask you to take your jacket off during class. Could it be that you always wear long sleeves?

It's okay, sweetheart. I had to find out the hard way, too.

Right now you're probably wishing your dad was home. He's the only one that will read your stories and tell you how creative you are. You don't have to beg him to watch movies with you, and he'll listen to your favorite songs without calling you suicidal. Right now, living with your spiteful sister, emotional mother, and self-indulgent stepfather - you probably think your dad is the only one that loves you.

But he's not there, is he?

For some reason unbeknownst to you, he's serving his last few months of a 3-year prison sentence. He writes to you every day and reminds you that you're loved. Have you ever thought to ask, "Why he's there in the first place?" Even now I don't understand why it never occurred to you. When you're nineteen years old and your sister tells you that your Uncle Jerry passing away at the same time your father went to prison isn't a coincidence… you'll wonder why you never asked, too.

Pretty soon your sister will admit something else. Your father isn't the paragon you imagine. He cheated on mom. It's okay though, he still loves you. Right now he's probably making promises. He promised you, your sister, brothers, and your evil step-mother that he will never drink again. Here's the good news: when he gets out of prison you'll finally have someone to lean on. The bad? It's not going to last.

I'm sorry, sweetheart. He's never going to stop drinking. He'll drive your stepmother away and ruin his already broken home. I know it's hard to hear this, but it's his fault. For the next few years you're going to defend him. Everyone will talk down about him and say that he deserves everything he got. You're going to scream, rage, and deny what you cannot understand. But it's not your fault; I know now that he didn't tell you what he told everyone else.

Your brothers, even though they're younger than you, knew why he went to prison. Your siblings all knew that he cheated on your mother, and that the reason you never knew your grandfather was that he was a sex-offender. Even now I wonder, "Why didn't he tell you?"

I know you love him more than anything, Naive 15; but let me tell you what happened to Budding 18. I remember it fragmentally. You were in college and you were asking your dad for money for a tattoo. You decided to waste your scholarships on a private school and move five hours away from him. It was hard, but you were making friends who didn't know about the burn book and didn't care if you liked girls.

You were sitting in your dorm room with your favorite hoodie and your baggy blue jeans and your roommate was inquiring about your grin. Your dad promised to send you the money, but that's not why you were smiling. You smiled because you got to talk to Daddy.

The next day was probably one of your worst. You were sitting on the grass in the commons; everyone was dressed in purple and your best friend was painting a horned frog on your face for the upcoming football game. For once you felt loved by someone else.

And then your phone rang.

You didn't understand why your stepmother was calling you. She never called and you both mutually hated each other. But she had to be the one to tell you. The phone call lasted around two minutes.

"I told your dad to tell you. He was supposed to yesterday when he called. I'm sorry…" She's never said that and she'll never say it again, "Your dad's back in prison."

You cried. You screamed and begged to know, "Why he didn't tell you?" The very question you should have asked for eighteen years suddenly wouldn't shut up. You went home without finishing a single year of college. It's not your fault; you didn't understand.

You're going to think that he hated you. You're going to wonder why he couldn't tell you all of these things. You'll wish he loved you as much as he loved everyone else.

It was a hard lesson to learn.

But eventually, Naive 15,  you'll know the truth. You'll realize that even if you are gay, it's no one's business. When you find out that everyone blamed you for a burn book you didn't even know existed, you'll have a good laugh about it. And you'll enjoy revealing to your old friends that you've never touched drugs in your life, and a blade has never cut your skin purposefully.

But most importantly, you'll realize why Daddy didn't tell you.

You were the only one who truly loved him. And as Wizened 21 learned through a long night of talking and a few beers… he never meant to hurt you. He just wanted you to keep the image in your head of a father that sang lullabies from Disney movies, and could never hurt anyone...

- especially not you, Naive 15.

Yeah, you're ignorant as Hell - but that's why you're loved.

Sincerely,
Wizened 21
:new: MY SECOND DAILY DEVIATION!

:faint: It's been several months since I've been able to update, but HOLY SHIT, another DD! :squee:

Special thanks to TruthisTruth for suggesting me, and GrimFace242 for featuring me, and thank you for either :+fav:ing, commenting, or reading! :tighthug:

Honored 2 Have Gotten DD Stamp by Mirz123




:happybounce:

A letter to myself...



This is my entry for PinkyMcCoversong & Beccalicious' Dear Teen Me Contest, complete at 982 words.

Basically, you had to write a letter to your teen self. Like many teenagers, my teen self wasn't exactly happy. ^^; I loved my father - he was the most important person in my life. Throughout my childhood I couldn't help but feel... betrayed. Now that I'm older, however; I understand. :shrug:

Join the contest yourself or check out the website here. :tighthug:

:heart: OfOneSoul
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Daily Deviation

Given 2014-05-07
Dear Daddy's Girl by OfOneSoul is a hard hitting piece of prose that reveals, while the truth can still hurt, it's not always so bad. ( Suggested by TruthisTruth and Featured by GrimFace242 )
:iconiammemyself:
This was a very well done piece. I can kind of relate in the fact that I kind of act like the person in there, not about the father part but on the behaviour, and I get how they cling to their father as being the only one who actually understands.
As was mentioned by the below commenter, I don't often read literature, I find myself usually skimming it, but for this every line caught my eye. It is descriptive, engaging, relatable, and thought-provoking.
The fact that you wrote it the way you talk makes it all the more real. If you're giving advice you don't sugarcoat it, you tell it like it is.
5/5 as you can see :P
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
71 out of 71 deviants thought this was fair.

:iconrouge-fox:
There is a moment in every child's life when we learn one of the most important lessons of growing up. That our parents are not perfect, and that can be heartbreaking. Because as a child you place them in the role of your heroes, no matter what mummy and daddy can always make it better and everything will be fine. Then it happens, you realize the truth. Mummy and Daddy aren't superheroes, they are only human. That realization can be heartbreaking, because humans are capable of great good and great evil, but our most redeeming feature is love. And even though our parents are not super-human, we hope that they will love us. This piece really touches my heart, because it illustrates a part of growing up we all have to face, but also gives us a clear sign that despite the mistakes our parent(s) can make, it doesn't mean they stop loving us.
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
60 out of 61 deviants thought this was fair.

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:iconatel1er:
ATEL1ER Featured By Owner Aug 21, 2014  Student General Artist
this really hits me. i've got chills.
Reply
:iconofonesoul:
OfOneSoul Featured By Owner Aug 22, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you for the lovely comment, darling! :iconrubcheeksplz:
Reply
:iconcionie:
Cionie Featured By Owner Aug 21, 2014  Professional Interface Designer
This is probably the best letter-to-self I've read so far. It's powerful in that it touches the reader without sounding too personal or too vague. Sometimes I wonder if people are aware that others read these when they are posted.

Yours is obviously very personal, but it still engages the reader and invites them into the world of Naive 15, instead of making them feel intrusive in someone else's diary.
Reply
:iconofonesoul:
OfOneSoul Featured By Owner Aug 22, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you for such a lovely comment, sweetheart! :iconrubcheeksplz:

It's greatly appreciated. :love:
Reply
:iconcenitopius:
Cenitopius Featured By Owner Jul 2, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
I am currently my own naive 15, and am happy to say that I've never done drugs and I never got into self-harming (though a blade has cut the back of my hand on purpose when I tried it out. Oh introvertial 13... things got better after a few more years and god knows you struggled till then). I'm proud to say my home's not so bad and. On the other hand I don't have one damned friend with parents that are still together and how weird is that when you look at it? Eh.
Anyways, I wanted to say that your piece was amazing. You perfectly depicted the changes in state of mind across the course of a few years, and the use of 'naive 15' and 'wizened 21' was a stunningly powerful idea when combined with the way that you write the piece as a whole. I'm not so good at describing these things, but you're awesome!
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:iconofonesoul:
OfOneSoul Featured By Owner Aug 23, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you for such a lovely comment, my love! I know this is a late response, but thank you. :iconsupertighthugplz:
Reply
:iconlucain24:
Lucain24 Featured By Owner Jul 1, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Damn....hit me like a storm... amazing..amazing.
Reply
:iconofonesoul:
OfOneSoul Featured By Owner Aug 23, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you for such a lovely comment, my love! I know this is a late response, but thank you. :iconsupertighthugplz:
Reply
:iconlucain24:
Lucain24 Featured By Owner Aug 23, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Indeed Cx 
Reply
:icontruthistruth:
TruthisTruth Featured By Owner May 17, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Congratulations on getting featured! :clap: I know I'm a little late in saying so, but I've been distracted. ^^; You deserved the DD. :hug:
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